25 Random Funny Things about Me

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. When you have completed the task, choose up to 25 people to be tagged. I decided to play. I hope you will too! Remember to copy this paragraph and paste it into a new note.  By the way, if you’re reading this, you’re tagged!

I tried to pick 25 funny, klutzy, and/or embarrassing moments because, well…they’re funnier and more interesting than my normal every day life. 😀

1. I ran the half mile in track my junior year of high school. The only time I didn’t come in last was when the girl in front of me tripped about three feet from the finish line. I yelled “thank you” to her as I ran by.

2. I was a “teacher’s helper” for a year in high school. I was stapling papers for the biology teacher, and accidentally stapled through my finger. The biology teacher (Dr. Huckabee) came in to see why I screeched, then just laughed at me.

3. I walked into a 5ft yellow metal pole when I was around 13. Mom and I were walking side by side, and I was looking at her while I was talking. Slammed right into the damn thing at full speed. I was quite stunned and I think I cried. Mom couldn’t help me because she was laughing so hard she couldn’t catch her breath. *ROFL*

4. I slammed all four fingers at once in the car door, while sitting IN the car! I had reached across my body for the seat belt with my right hand, while closing the car door with my left. I misjudged the distance and my fingers were caught between the door and the frame of the car. I don’t know how I managed not to break any of them.

5. I tripped over the gas hose while filling up my car a few years ago. I don’t know WHY I decided to step over the hose rather than going around the car! It turned into one of those slow motion nightmares where you know you’re screwed just as you pick up your foot. I fell on my hands and knees in front of a gas station full of people, and rolled on the ground a bit. I jumped up and laughed, then slid into the driver’s seat and cried. *lol*

6. Frank nearly gave me a concussion two years ago. We had just arrived at a Ren Faire and were getting stuff out of the back of the van. I stopped to adjust something and the next thing I knew, a sledgehammer slammed into the top of my head. I saw stars and fell to my knees and cried. Frank hadn’t realize how close I was to the back of the van, so when he yanked down the back hatch, the corner of it slammed into the top of my head. Amazingly enough, I didn’t get a headache and only had a bruised area on the top of my head.

7. Chelsea, Frank and I all came down with a terrible case of stomach flu within a few hours of each other. The only person who wasn’t sick was Gavin. It was the worst night EVER. In the wee hours of the morning, Chelsea put in the movie “The Devil Wears Parada” to try to keep our minds off our upset stomachs.

At one point in the movie, one of the characters said “I’m only one stomach flu away from reaching my ideal weight.” Chelsea and I laughed so hard that our poor tortured stomach muscles ached and ached.

8. When I was 10, we moved into a house that had the bedrooms at either end of a small hallway, with the bathroom in the middle. The first night we moved in, mom and I bumped into each other in the hallway in the dead of night outside the bathroom door. We screamed in fright, then screeched again because the THING we bumped into was screaming. It took us a minute or so to realize it was just us.

9. Our first house (Frank and I) only had one bathroom, located in the hallway. For about six month, Frank and I were in some weird cycle where we were waking up in the middle of the night about the same time to use the restroom. Several times we bumped into each other in the hallway, scaring each other to death. (I don’t know why Chelsea never woke up, I screeched every time I bumped into him. lol….)

Then one night Frank decided to wait at the end of the hall and said “Don’t scream….” as I came out of the bathroom. Needless to say, I did. (Hello? Disembodied voices in the middle of the night are scary!) Finally, we agreed to wait IN THE BED until the other person came back.

10. Frank had a nightmare and punched a “bad guy” in his dream. Except that he REALLY lashed out and kidney punched me in the back. I remember waking up in pain saying “What the….?!??!” and him leaning over saying “I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry!”

11. Are you familiar with the Hallelujah Chorus? Near the end the choir sings “Hallelujah! Hallelujah!” several times in a row. Except, during one crucial portion near the end of the song there is a long pause before the last grand “Hallelujah!” (Start watching about 3:15)

As a teen, my family attended a holiday presentation at a local church. The Choir Master invited the “public” to come up and sing with the choir, not really expecting anyone to take him up on the offer. My parents, much to my embarrassment, decide that it would be fun for the family to join in.

It wouldn’t have been too bad except I can’t read music, and I wasn’t familiar with the Hallelujah Chorus at that time. I was “Hallelujah-ing” along quite loudly with the choir when suddenly EVERYONE stopped for the pause. Except for me. I let out a loud, off-key “HAAAAAA….llelujah?” that echoed throughout the church. I. Wanted. To. Die.

12. When Chelsea was itty bitty and still in a car seat, I accidentally locked her in the car while it was still running. I had to call the police to unlock the car door for me.

13. I destroyed my knee in high school, skiing down the BUNNY hill during my youth group outing. My first and only time every on skis.

14. I tripped at home and dumped an entire can of Coke all over Chelsea, only a few hours before her Prom.

15. I have walked into walls, bookshelves, door frames, and have smacked myself in the face and glasses with cabinet doors more times than I can count.

16. The first time I trashed my Mom’s car I was about 30 years old. I backed into a tree.

17. I dislocated Chelsea’s right elbow twice within a year. The first time she tripped, and I jerked up on her arm to keep her from face planting on the side walk. The second time I had taken her hand and stood up the same moment she threw herself to the ground during a temper tantrum. I was glad I had witnesses!

18. I have whacked Gavin in the head with the Wii remote at least a half-dozen times while bowling. He’s finally learned to avoid me.

19. I ironed my hand when I was about 4. I was afraid I was going to get into trouble, so I put the iron away and THEN cried. I told my mom I had dropped my crayons on my hand.

20. I hit a pedestrian with my car. Not hard enough to knock him over or anything, just tapped his briefcase.

21. I pinched a nerve in my back simply by leaning over to pick up a book. I was in bed for three days. THREE DAYS! And I was in too much pain to enjoy it.

22. I fell down my grandmother’s stairs as a child. I don’t even remember what happened. Just slip, tumble and feeling very dizzy at the bottom.

23. I fed my cousin dried cat food. I was too young to know better, and he was too little to realize it tasted nasty.

24. I fell off a redwood tree log while camping and broke my wrist. Mom had to drive hours to find a hospital big enough to reset the bones. (How did my mom survive my childhood?)

25. I ran into a telephone poll with my bike as a kid. I was careening out of control down a hill in San Francisco. I hit the pole, flew off the seat and crashed into the handlebars and handlebar stem. I laid on the corner a good five minutes before the pain wore off enough for me to limp home. To this day I don’t find groin humor the slightest bit funny.


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